Life
I have a thought on how life should be, and I am sure that one day I will have a moment where I lived exactly like I wanted. his piece does not follow a structured flow or a planned order of thoughts. I wrote it the way my mind moved one thought leading to the next, without going back to fix the path. So if it feels like it jumps between ideas, that is intentional. This is less of an article and more of a mind speaking to itself on paper.
I am currently 22 and will step into 23 in two months from now. So basically I am a full adult with responsibilities and some big things to do. I am not sure whether I lived the life I actually wanted, or whether I wanted to live a life by seeing others and consuming things around me. So I am not sure of anything. Some people figured it out by their teenage years, but it takes quite some time for others that is okay, not everyone gets enlightened at the same time, right? What do I like? What do I love to do? What brings me joy? I may have figured some of that out, but it is not going to stay the same. We are humans and we need different things to keep us entertained, so it will change but there will definitely always be something that drives us to live.
Currently I am searching for a stable job as my family situation is on a razor’s edge. Every day there is not a single conversation without figuring out a job, getting rid of debts, becoming debt-free, living a good life. I am trying my hardest to change this, I may say. Nothing seems to be changing. I see people who are not as knowledgeable working in companies while I can’t even get a single interview done. So this is a very hard pill to swallow. I hope good times come before I lose my mind or change my mind.
So I am currently not living the life I wanted. But it is teaching me many things that I need to know when I get into a certain position, what should I do and what should I not do. It is a hard phase, but it is building a foundation that will make sure I never get into such a situation again in the future.
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In my childhood I wanted to be a scientist. After seeing a police movie I wanted to be an IPS officer. After that, an astronaut. After that, an astrophysicist. Now I am an AI/ML graduate with no designated position yet. Every dream I had was some influence of a movie or what my parents told me, except for the astrophysics phase and the current AI/ML studies. So I actually never had a clear dream and worked specifically for it. Till my college days, I don’t think there are many things I can say I truly enjoyed and lived in the moment. College was quite a good time in my life though. The majority of my friends who are now outside my home village are from college.
Living life is not being born, doing what your parents thought or said to do, working a job, clearing a debt, building a house, getting married, having kids and going on with the blueprint that every human follows. That is not living. That is following the invisible rules that we have been forced to follow to keep life going without any embarrassment or failure. I am not telling you to avoid your parents’ words you must understand that you and your parents are not in the same place now and have not experienced the same past. So you have to work on yourself and prove yourself. Everyone should have an ideology of their own on how they want to be, how their life should look, and how they are going to live it.
For me, I want to be seriously rich and do business. I also have a contradicting belief to have enough money to travel the world, feel safe in any unannounced situation, and just live life. But I will go with being rich, because people nowadays are falling towards being minimal, colourless, and more of followers of trends. I want to live a life where I can enjoy everything I want to do. At the same time, I don’t want so much money that nothing can excite me anymore 🤧.
I want to live life by doing many things. The main thing for now is a job, and after some time it will switch to business. I will try to do different things arts, music, musical instruments, dance, running, blogging, travelling, gaming, and it goes on. Because in the canvas of life, we should paint with more colours more experiences. By doing the same thing, we can be perfect at it, but it won’t be as colourful as trying everything. We should be skilful in what our name stands for, and we need to try all the other things too. We can’t be good at everything, but knowing that, we can still try and enjoy and experience things. That is life. At the end, our canvas won’t be perfect but it will be unique, memorable, with each colour having its own story to tell, and every colour spent painting it yourself, not copying someone else. You will have stories and information to share with people. Most people who just follow the invisible rules don’t have these. They just vanish from the world.
I want to explore the world. In this massive world, you are smaller than a dot, and you are at one side of the earth while there is almost 99.9 percent of the world you haven’t seen and that bothers me. So I want to travel, meet people, and have at least one friend in every country I visit. The travel should be for around 15 to 30 days, without a plan just land in the country, go to places, be spontaneous, live like the people there, enjoy the time, and wow in that moment you will realise the beauty of life and the fact that you only have one, so you should never miss an opportunity.
I am a little hesitant to show my face on the internet, to pose for photos, and for a lot of other things but that is what makes me, me. Accepting that has made me look better in pictures without even trying. So you should live life and have as many side quests as you can. Humans are not like computers, washing machines, or televisions built to do only one given job. We are curious people. There is AI now to do all the work, but we humans have curiosity, which no other species has quite like us. Be curious, be adventurous, travel, enjoy life, try many things we are born for that. Try, fail there is nothing wrong in failing something you just tried. Life is meant to be lived, not escaped. There will be terrible times, but we have to get through them and find a way to live like ourselves.
