AD2L S48 Explorer Playoff Match Review (Week 5)
Frank Herbert was born in Washington state in the halcyon year of 1920 and from a young age he demonstrated great talent for reading and art, photography in particular. His early career was mainly as a photographer until he took some creative writing classes and began his interest in writing as a career. I should also point out that in his mid-20s, he began reading and studying philosophy for fun after befriending some psychologists. He was honestly not that successful and like all great men he was carried to victory by his wife who was working full time to support his ass, very unusual for the time (1960s). According to Frankie, Dune took six years to write, which was largely due to his extensive research and internal world-building.
But this would all pay off with the release of Dune in 1965 (technically released as a 2-part story in Analog Science Fact & Fiction. Mr. Herbert wrote and released six novels in the Dune series, not finishing the 7th and final installment before his death at age 65 of a massive pulmonary embolism. His personal political beliefs and philosophy greatly shaped his work, especially in the Dune series, and he was very outspoken as a strong Libertarian. Keep this in mind as we progress through the series here.
What is not really touched on in the films is the history of the Dune Universe. Before Timmy ever waltzed on down to Arrakis to create a Chocolate Factory or play Table Tennis, a lot of actually really important shit happened. A really long time ago, humans were like, wow AI is really cool 🙂. The technocratic elites basically used their access to these super computers to control the common man, and eventually the common man was like, guys this low key sucks ass lol let’s become French for a lil’ bit and OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT. This became known as the Jihad, and after a little under 100 years, humans had entirely wiped out clankers and universally agreed to one main thing:
Thou Shalt Not Make a Machine in the Likeness of a Human Mind
This would end up defining the universe of Dune in a huge way, as for the remainder of the TENS OF THOUSANDS of year the story covers, not even a fucking calculator (calc for short, chat) would be permitted. This leaves Dune in stark contrast to pretty much all other sci-fi universes, where it’s just kind of taken for granted that computers are uber powerful and can perform anything from infinite calculations to basically magic.
One other note here is that in the years following the end of the Jihad, which was of course was a very tumultuous time, there was a huge battle in which the Corrino Imperium came out on top and would become the rulers of pretty much all humanity for the next 10 millenia or so. But after the battle, one guy accused another of being a yellow-belly BITCH and got him exiled. The exiled guy? Abulurd Harkonnen. The snitch? some random guy from House Atreides. Fortunately, this would not become a beef that lasted 10,000 years or anything, right?
The last last thing before we get to Dune, and of course this is typically all revealed piecemeal throughout the story, is the Great Convention. This was where everyone agreed that wireback cogsuckers are banned 5eva, that human life is important, that atomic weapons cannot be used against human targets, and effectively established the three main powerhouses of the universe: The Imperium (in charge of everything), the Great Houses (the enforcers and enactors of Executive policy), and the Spacing Guild (they figured out how to travel through space without compooters). The last group here I will note are one of two groups who figured out space travel and the answer basically is to have a psychic calculator man fly the ship. Outside but also inside, was the wholly opaque order of the Bene Gesserit. As you read the books, you realize more and more that they were and are pulling the strings behind like, everything, but as a quick overview, they are kind of a smooth protein shake like mixture of cult, religious order, phrenologists, lobbyist group, Mossad, I mean they really dip their dainty fingers into a lot of Spice Pies. Oh and they are all women, that’s important.
So who cares, none of that seems relevant, I wanna see Lisan al-Gaib!
Ok flash forward 10,000 years, and humanity is kind of chilling. The Emperor calls up the leader of House Atreides and is like, “Bro, what the FUCK is up lmfao, I got a new job for you and it’s gonna be sick. You are now in charge of Arrakis! Pack your shit and fucking GO!”. And at first you might be like, ok, so what? Well maybe if you stopped asking so many god DAMN questions I’d be able to get to my point! Arrakis is a dogshit desert planet that is borderline uninhabitable. So this seems like a raw deal, but actually, this planet is the only source of Spice, which is kind of the magical MacGuffin which drives the whole story. Spice inhalation is the only way for the Spacing Guild pilots to be able to fly their enormous spaceships without any computer help, meaning the entire universal economy relies on spice to function. So this is a huge promotion for Duke Leto, made even sweeter as he is ousting the Harkonnens who had previously been in control! And as we recall, House Atreides hates House Harkonnen and vice versa. BUT, this was secretly all a ploy by the Emperor, who is working with the Harkonnen to destroy House Atreides! Leto has become too popular by being hot and nice and good at ruling, which made Christopher Walken jealous so he teamed up with Shamu to take his ass down,
And already we get to a super major plot point that will not be revealed for a very long time. But because I’m a bro, I will share with my loyal readers. Originally, Arrakis was a normal planet with like, water and rain and stuff, but the introduction of sandtrout to the planet caused huge planetary-scale terraforming. Sandtrout are the larval form of the iconic sandworms of Dune, and have a truly fascinating symbiotic relationship with their adult forms. Sandtrout seek out water and capture it, entering a metamorphosis stage with enough absorbed. 6 years later, they emerge as young sandworms, to whom water is now deadly. So sandtrout effectively terraform an area to make it habitable for their adult selves. Adult sandworms eat mainly sand plankton and smaller sandworms, excreting the spice that is so critical to all of humanity in Dune’s universe. The “natives” of the desert planet arrived long after the terraforming was complete, though not long before spice was discovered to have such potential. The Fremen, as they came to be known, created their own culture on this plant in harmony with the sandworms and sandtrout and have an uneasy truce/alliance with the Imperium; the latter is allowed to harvest spice from the planet, while the former is allowed to have extended autonomy (compared to a standard colonized planet).
Ok, so we are back to Duke Leto, who arrives on Arrakis and is all set to try and do his best! Well that did not last and shortly after they moved in, House Harkonnen rolled in secretly to assassinate the whole House, aided by the BETRAYER, Doctor Yueh. Leto gets his ass killed, along with the real main character of the series: Duncan Idaho. But escaping into the desert is Leto’s concubine Jessica and some guy named Paul! This is a big problem because this whole move was to end the house bloodline and they did not do that.
But this Paul guy, important? Ok maybe a little.
Flash back to the Bene Gesserit. They have one main goal, which is to carry out a massive breeding program over millennia to create a Messiah-like figure called the Kwisatz Haderach. All other plans and conniving were really to this end, but Jessica Atreides fell in love with Duke Leto and gave him a son instead of the daughter she was supposed to. Lil’ Paulie got Bene Gesserit psychic powers, so they were like, “I guess this is kind of the Messiah? But we can’t control him, which is bad”. The other big Bene Gesserit secret we don’t find out until way later is that they implant superstitions and mythologies on “primitive” planets in order to use them for their own personal gain later. One of those was the idea of Lisan al-Gaib, a Christ-like figure who would lead them to a future of milk and honey.
Flash forward to the desert. Paul is huffing spice and like Aaron Rodgers in the off-season, his third eye awakens and he SEES THE FUTURE. Or at least, potential futures. One of those is him at the helm of the Fremen as a holy army, cleansing the galaxy of all who oppose him as God Emperor. But that future seems kind of bad so let’s ignore it for now! Paul shacks up with Spider-man’s girlfriend and his mom gives birth to his sister, as she was knocked up before he died. Important to note here is that momma Atreides underwent a secret ritual to become a Reverend Mother (more powerful Bene Gesserit) while she was pregnant which resulted in baby Alia getting super powers in the womb.
A few years pass, we’re on to Movie #2, and House Harkonnen has overtaken the planet. They are really not a great fit here because they are pale and hairless and sunscreen is banned by the forms 😔But Paul is like, I gotta be more powerful! So he tries to undergo the same ritual momma did, knowing FULL WELL it is deadly to men. I mean, can women have anything in this world? He drinks one drop of the EXTREMELY POISONOUS and EXTREMELY MISLEADINGLY NAMED Water of Life, passes out for three weeks, but wakes up with omega super powers. He can now see the future, which is a blessing and a curse, as we will examine. But note here that he knows everything that is going to happen so him being upset or surprised makes literally no sense.
He realizes that the Emperor is coming to Arrakis to quell the brewing Fremen uprising, and decides now is the time to fuck. The emperor’s super soldiers raid his little cave, killing his kid (RIP) and abducting his sister. Well his infant sister is actually an awakened being with the knowledge of all previous generations so she kills the Harkonnen Baron (who killed her dad and who is actually her grandfather lol) while Paul rolls up on the capital riding a sand worm (HOLY BASED). Skirting the rules about using atomic weapons on human targets, Paul uses nukes on the mountains instead, so the rocks fall and kill the enemy soldiers (Hey, my bullets didn’t kill you! It was acute organ failure due to blood loss!). He faces off against the Emperor and is like, “aight good news and bad news; I am omnipotent and will blow up the entire planet unless you totally surrender right now. The good news is that I’m not you”. So Paul takes the throne, marrying the Emperor’s daughter purely for political reasons while forever loving his Fremen mistress. This is where book one of 6 (SEVEN) ends but is only the start of the whole story.
…you thought I was done?? Nah bro, lock the fuck in.
Flash forward 12 years. Paul is emperor, and a holy jihad has been waged across the universe in his name, but he’s kind of pressed that 60+ billion people have died in his name so far. The Bene Gesserit, Spacing Guild, and a new player, the Bene Tleilax all meet up to plot Paul’s downfall. This new group is a little fucked up, in that they are able to shape-shift their faces and have kind of xenophobic beliefs; their ultimate goal is to wipe out all other races but they don’t share that openly. Think like, Congressman from Wyoming, not Nick Fuentes — they have the same beliefs but one is more open about it. Their secret weapon is Paul’s wifey Irulan, who weirdly wasn’t super pleased with her dad being deposed as Emperor by this random sand-neighbor.
Step 1 of the plan is gifting Paul with a “ghola”, which is basically a homunculus in this universe: a kind of clone created to perfectly mimic a dead person, though with none of their memories. This ghola is of Duncan Idaho, the GOAT, and is the first of MANY. I was not joking when I said this mf was the real MC. The Fremen don’t like gholas, for some reason, and this one in particular is programmed to kill Paul when it senses a moment of weakness from him. Step 2 of the plan is to secretly prevent Zendaya from getting pregnant, which involves Irulan slipping plan B into her food every day. Paul knows about this (???) but because he also knows Chani will die during childbirth, he’s fine with it. Pause here bro. Have you considered pulling out rather than letting your wife poison your mistress to avoid being a single dad? Idk, just a thought.
But step 3 was pretty diabolical: the Tleilaxu get a band of Fremen dissidents together and in classic CIA fashion gave them a nuke to do crimes with. They blow it up, killing a lot of people and blinding Paul!
This is a win because in Fremen culture, if you’re blind, you have to walk off alone into the desert because you’re useless… Dota would be a very sparely populated game if we enforced this rule tbh. But Paul is like, lol I’m like psychic so I don’t even need my eyes to see. So I’m NOT FUCKIN’ LEAVING!
Chani gets knocked up, has twins, and dies in childbirth. Who could have seen this coming?? Paul is beary sad when Chani dies, which activates Fake Duncan Idaho, but the spirit of Potatoes overtakes him, bringing back all of the original Duncan Idaho’s memories. He no longer wants to kill his BRO Paul, and they are bros 4eva again. But the drama continues as the most evilest Tleilaxu (to be played by Robert Pattinson! Hype) picks up a baby and is like “I will stab a baby if you don’t abdicate the throne right now bitch”. Paul realizes that the birth of the twins has actually removed his Daredevil blind-vision, but his newborn son is fully conscious and contains all knowledge of his ancestors because of spice and shit and is like, time to help my dumbass blind ass dad, hope he doesn’t become a deadbeat after this, and psychically projects his own BABY SIGHT into his dad’s mind so Paul can throw a knife at Scytale and kill his ass. He leaves his sister in charge, tells her to look after the kids, and walks off into the desert as Fremen law dictates. His sister, who is now fuckin’ Duncan Idaho 2, orders like, every motherfucker put to death, though Irulan is allowed to live for whatever reason.
Now I just want to take a second to point out that the twins are named Leto II and Ghanima. Ignoring that “Ghanima” is a name that comes out of nowhere, can we talk about how Paul named a second child Leto after the first one died?? That’s just absolutely crazy fucking work.
To me, this is kind of where “part 2” of the Dune series begins. Paul’s arc is mostly over, and the arc of Leto II rises starting now. We are now 9 years post-Paul, and there’s some serious shit going down on Arrakis. What I don’t think I mentioned was the secret goal of the Fremen in the first place, which was the terraforming of Arrakis back into like, a habitable place that is nice. They have started doing this in the south of the planet, and it’s working! But the Atreides have realized that this terraforming will ultimately wipe out the sandworms, who are, like many card game players, deathly allergic to taking a shower. At the same time, we see the downside of these kids being born “awakened”, as Paul’s sister Alia has become possessed by the spirit of her Grandpa, Baron Harkonnen (only possible because the personalities of all her ancestors are in her mind, allowing one powerful one to take control in some cases)! The kids are worried it’ll happen to them too, while their possessed aunt is on some evil shit.
Paul’s momma comes to visit, and immediately realizes that her daughter is possessed. But, good news, the kids are alright! Alia tries to kill her mom, but fails. Duncan Idaho realizes that his wifey Alia is be evil now, so he takes the kids and Jessica and escapes into the desert. Now there’s some overcooking: The twins fake Leto’s death, leaving Leto free to escape even further into the desert, searching for a mysterious blind preacher 🤔, while his sister self-hypnotizes herself to believe Leto was killed so nobody will think she’s lying. This decision has no benefit but almost causes some big fucking problems. Duncan and Jessica fuck off back to Salusa Secundus, where the remnants of the Corrino Imperium reside.
While all this is happening, I’d be remiss to not mention that much of the bad stuff befalling the poor (underage btw) Atreides kids is because of their aunt, Princess Wensicia Corrino. Paul’s wife, Irulan, had a sister who was doubly bent out of shape by her dad no being Emperor no more. She tasked her son Farad’n with killing the chitlins, but after he meets Jessica (his… uncle’s mom?) he decides that’s fucked up and agrees to not kill the twins. Jessica, on behalf of the Bene Gesserit, is like “aight if you’re cool then we’re cool, you can marry my granddaughter and we will support your bid for Emperor”, and Ghanima is like “Yeah I am on board!”…but secretly she believes that Farad’n was responsible for Leto’s death and she plans to merc his ass first chance she gets.
While all that is happening, one of the most important events in all of Dune is going on. Leto II is captured by Fremen as he’s walking around, and is forced to undergo a spice trance. He sees the same set of possible futures as his father, Paul, but unlike dear old dad, he locks the FUCK in and says, I will commit to making this specific future a reality. Like Doctor Strange, he sees near infinite futures where humanity goes extinct, but only one where it survives. So, you cannot criticize anything he does from here on out because it was required for humanity to survive…The Golden Path!
Immediately, he escapes his captors and allows himself to be totally enveloped by sandtrout. These larval sandworms fuse with him, granting him superhuman strength, invulnerability, and a…unique look.
He worms his way to meet the Preacher who, ur not gonna believe this, IS PAUL! Wowza! He presumably asks dad if he ever did get those cigarettes, and they head on back to the capital for the final showdown. Duncan shows up, rage baiting the leader of the Fremen into killing him so that he would have to go into hiding along with Ghanima. This half works, because he gets kilt, but Ghanima is immediately re-captured by auntie Alia. She arranges the marriage of Ghanima to Farad’n, knowing that the former plans to kill the latter, and ultimately hopes to fuck shit up. Leto and Paul show up, but the royal guards immediately fucking kill Paul. Leto is like, it’s worming time! and starts fucking shit up, which triggers the return of Ghanima’s memories. He rolls up to Alia and is like, do you want help fighting the possession and she is like I got a better idea:
Leto is like, “Ok well then, uh, that’s rough Auntie…but anyway, I am Emperor now. Also, I will live forever because I am a worm. Also, I will marry my twin sister(?????) to consolidate power. But I can’t reproduce because I am a worm, so Farad’n can you do me a favour and fuck her for me?” Please note that Herbert wrote this under NO duress whatsoever.
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So we casually flash forward again 3500 years, and both a lot and weirdly, not a lot, has happened. Leto is the God Emperor of all humanity, looking like fucking JD Vance I mean tell me I’m wrong:
Arrakis has been totally terraformed into a Pacific-Northwestern US style forest, which probably really pleased the Fremen…except they pretty much got tossed by the wayside to be replaced by an army of bad bitches under Leto’s direct control. Leto realized that men are just like, fucked up inherently and only women can be trusted to not constantly vie for more power, so his private Fish Speaker force is all girly pops. All spice is produced in a little sandbox that Leto controls, but it’s not a big deal because Leto basically stopped all space travel. All humanity lives like a Witcher NPC, just kind of getting by in extreme poverty, while Leto is known as a cruel and uncaring despot.
Maybe skipping too much here, but for all the weebs out there, you will recognize the storyline unfolding here. Be it Code: Geass or Attack on Titan, you can look no further than Dune for the origination of the big twist ending that you thought was yours. Tell me if this sounds Main Character becomes evil and does terrible things, ultimately resulting in all other groups banding together to take him down and uniting against a common enemy. Sorry folks, Eren Yeager learned it from Leto! Yes, as we will come to learn, the Golden Path of humanity’s survival requires all of humanity to come together to overthrow the most horrific despot in history. This was all part of the plan, a plan that Paul was not strong enough to enact, leaving his son to take the burden.
Lest you thought Duncan Idaho was out of the picture, Leto has had homegrown gholas of Funky Dunky made for millennia, helping him maintain what was left of his humanity. He kind of understands that each Duncan is not super happy with him, but he accepts that This Is The Way, and remains committed to the Golden Path.
I’m trying to not get into too much like, random BS lore, but I want to take like one second to talk about the Ixians. They are basically the only civilization in all of Dune who still like, has tech at all. Secretly, they violated the forms and created computers, developing a breeding program that allowed for genetically engineered humans (without the need for Bene Gesserit hundred-millennia breeding plans), which is relevant because they pumped out Hwi Noree. She would become a very important character, starting…now!
Hwi arrives on Arrakis ostensibly as an ambassador, and though Leto knows she’s a honey-pot, he falls for her anyway. Jensen Huang proposes and she agrees, but secretly she is in love with Duncan Idaho. I mean you vs the guy she says not to worry about, just saying. At the same time, Leto’s great X 100 granddaughter, Siona, is secretly working to merc his ass, and after he takes her out into the desert he gives her a spicy spice vision and she sees the Golden Path (POG!). However, two important things happen: one, she sees that Leto’s destruction is part of the path, and a light drizzle causes him serious damage.
Wedding bells are ringing, and all our MCs are together, whether they know it or not. As Leto worms his way across a super high bridge, Siona is like “hey, my Fish Speaker Bodyguard, you’re ordered by the Emperor to do whatever I say, right? Well I say, shoot the bridge struts with your magic gun.” and her bodyguard is like, welp, here I go, killing again! The Bridge collapses and Leto falls into a river below, causing his wormy body to disintegrate. Unfortunately, Hwi also dies and Duncan is mega pissed. As Leto dies, he explains that this was alllllll part of the plan baby and Siona is the first human with a special ability to be invisible to psychics. Yes, The Golden Path required the creation of humans who could not be predicted, allowing them to buckle the reigns of fate and choose their own destiny!
Leto’s goal was to show humanity writ-large that a perfectly run, safe and stable empire run by a single omnipotent being is simply not desirable. From now on, any political figure looking to replicate this model will have to explain how they will better run their dictatorship than an immortal God Worm, which is simply not tenable. His death causes a total decentralization of mankind, propelled in part by the resurgent Spacing Guild, who worked with the Ixians to develop navigation computers, eliminating the need for Spice. This is the close of what I consider the second arc of the Dune novels, though you could argue this is more the close of a complete first arc, starting with Paul and ending with his son, Leto II.
The subsequent books in the series really follow a new arc, with ya boi Duncan Idaho back again. 500 years since the fall of Leto, there is a new power system in the galaxy. The Bene Gesserit, who were kind of in the background for a while, are back as major players, along with the Bene Tleilax and the Ixians. Represented here are three groups with different loci of control: Religion, Spycraft, and Technology. The Tleilaxians have figured out how to create Spice without sandworms (which would have been useful 15,000 year ago guys…), the Ixians have figured out how to fly through space without Spice and have “no-ships” that are entirely undetectable, and the BGs are just being sneaky manipulators trying to pool political power across the universe.
But the balance is totally thrown off when a new race of Amazonian warrior women roll up to the Galaxy and are like, death to all men except the ones we need for sexual slavery.
Well wtf does this have to do with Dune?? Well we’re getting there, chill. First of all, we gotta pump out a new Duncan Idaho, who pops out of the Axotl Tank with a baddy ready to fuck him into being loyal to the Bene Gesserit. He does not go for it (Pass the fucking controller bro) and the duo meets up with a retired military commander who is meant to train Duncan in the Ways of War, Miles Teg. Well they end up fucking off, and Teg awakens Duncan’s memories… some of them at least. This awakening bars our BG Baddy, Lucilla, from infecting his mind, which kind of pisses her off, but she moves on quickly as Teg sacrifices himself to the Evil Amazon Ladies to let them escape. Ok bro, yeah we get it, really brave sacrifice here. Oh no, I hope they don’t fuck me every day 😞
Well before that, they torture him in the not fun way to figure out where Duncan went (Everybody Loves Mr. Potato!), but his third eye opens and he discovers he has mega mind powers. He escapes and takes over a ship from them.
Meanwhile, Duncan gets intercepted by another Amazon lady (maybe I should start calling them “Honored Matres” lol), but as she attempts to dom him, he unlocks his inner dom powers and basically…counter-rapes her? I really do not know the best way to describe this, Herbert was on some shit with this one, but basically she forces herself on him but he accesses the Avatar state and pulls the memories of all his ancestors together to fuck her, countering her control and actually knocking her up. Frank…can we agree this is just fetish content at this point?
All the while, unmentioned by me, the second most important character of the final arc of Dune was quietly being hunted down by…well everyone lol. Sheeana, a poor orphan girl on “Rakis”, what they renamed Arrakis after Leto’s fall, realizes that she can control sandworms. A lot of people are interested in her because of this, not the least of all the Bene Gesserit, who send Teg’s Mom, Odrade, a BG Reverend Mother, to train and protect her. Together, they find a secret note from Big Worm along with a huge stash of Spice, stating that the Bene Gesserit should find “Noble Purpose”.
The climax is basically the leader of the Bene Gesserit rolling up with the leader of the Bene Tleilaxu, and the dynamic duo of Odrade and Sheeana find out the goal of the BGs is to totally glass Rakis to remove Leto’s influence on history. Well the Honored Matres also roll up and merc both Bene Leader-shits, leaving Odrade in charge of the full Bene Gesserit order while she escapes on a GIANT WORM. Duncan, Lucilla, and Murbella (the Amazon lady he, uh, defeated in sexual battle?) meet up with Teg, who takes them to Rakis, meeting up with now Mother Superior Odrade and Worm Whisperer Sheeana. Teg rage-baits the Honored Matres into nuking the shit out of Rakis, killing all sandworms (and himself) and ending natural spice production. …But secretly Sheeana has one with her and together the merry band escapes to the DOUBLY secret Bene Gesserit planet Chapterhouse.
Which brings us to the final, tragic non-conclusion of Dune, the series. The seventh book would never materialize due to the death of Herbert, so the 6th canon story must be accepted, cliffhangers and all, as the de facto conclusion of the series.
We find ourselves on the secret Bene Gesserit planet of Chapterhouse. The Tleilaxians have been wiped out entirely except for one guy, a ghola of the guy that Paul killed 4 books ago by throwing a knife at his ass. He alone has the secret of ghola production, critical to the Universe as without it the supply of Duncan Idahos will dry up. He shares this technology with his captors, the Bene Gesserit, but holds off on sharing how to make the artificial Spice, as a bargaining chip. The first ghola they make is actually Miles Teg! Back again after his noble sacrifice on Rakis.
The latest Duncan Idaho and Murbella, who are in a super bizarre relationship, are technically captives of the BG, though they agree to train Murbella in the BG ways despite their distrust of her. Apparently, both Duncan and Murbella have like, dommed the other into being sexually dependent on each other, but they really don’t like that fact or each other really. Kind of like the average Dota player, who says “I fucking hate this game” as they immediate queue up again.
Ok, this next part I want to stress is not a bit and is actually what Frank Herbert wrote ok so don’t be mad at me. Lucilla is the Chancellor of a Bene Gesserit planet, but it is attacked and destroyed by the Honor Matres. She escapes to a new planet, but not before mind-absorbing all the Bene Gesserit citizens from her planet, where she finds an underground civilization of Jews. This planet used to be the homeworld of House Harkonnen, but secretly there was an underground civilization of Jews called Secret Israel, made up of Hebrews who wanted to escape endless persecution on Earth millennia ago. The Bene Gesserit knew of them and they deal in secret together in self-preservation. However, they betray Lucilla and her crew to the Honored Matres to save themselves, which leads me to ask why did we choose to have the only group in all of Dune based on a literal real group of people, not like even a slightly veiled allegory or anything, be the sneaky betrayers?? Even JK Rowling had more tact than this, I mean I’m gonna get demonetized here Frank!!
Before the final betrayal, the Rabbi reveals a woman who has somehow naturally learned the Bene Gesserit ways, Rebecca. Lucilla mind melds with Rebecca, giving her all the millions of BG consciousnesses and tasking her with delivering them back to Chapterhouse. Lucilla is captured by the Honored Matres, refusing to share the secrets of her order with them, earning her: death. However, before she dies, she (we) learn that the Honored Matres are a mixture of Bene Gesserits and Fish Speakers who fled the galaxy after Leto’s death, but were forced to return as they fled from an even greater threat!
A lot of fucking intrigue from here on out, which I am going to try and streamline as best I can. Previous books had a lot of wars, but this is a lot of “Sally tricked Johnny but secretly Alice was pulling the strings”
Mother Superior Odrade, the leader of the Bene Gesserit and momma to Teg, visits Duncan in captivity, and gets him to admit that he is both a Mentat and has access to the Duncan Idaho Avatar state: all the memories of all his part lives. She also figures out the Duncan and Sheeana are friends and working together. Sheeana uses a secret technique to awaken Teg’s ghola, bringing back all his memories, but Momma don’t know this. Murbella gets promoted to Revend Mother in the BG order after snorting a shit ton of spice, and her 13th eye opens, revealing to herself that she wants to be a Bene Gesserit.
Like me 10 seconds into dry humping a pillow next to my wife, we’re reaching the climax here! It is showdown time and right before Odrade meets with the leader of the Honored Matres for a final battle, she tells Murbella and Sheeana that they are next in line should she fall in battle.
Teg uses his super power to see the invisible ships of the Honored Matres, and the commander of the HM army kills the leader of the Great Honored Matre Dama, throwing up the white flag! The battle is seemingly won, until the trap is sprung! The Matres have a secret weapon that just instantly kills, like some Rick and Morty shit, without leaving any visible wounds or damage. It looks like GG for BG, but there was one final gamble. Murbella flies to HM HQ and says “Hey everybody! I was a prisoner of the Bene Gesserit but I escaped! I have all their secrets, can I come join yinz on the winning side?” and of course they are like, “Hell yeah sister, bet, let’s go stillers!”
BUT this was all a doubly double cross and as soon as she meets the new leader of the Honored Matres, the same lady who killed Dama and took control like 5 minutes ago, she basically is like “lmao u suck fight me to see whomst should really be in charge” and conveniently, she wins! Odrade witnesses this and transfers all her memories and power into her, just as the last few loyalists kill her ass to protest the third leadership change in as many hours. Murbella announces the merger of the Bene Gesserit and Honored Matres, forming a new coalition under her command that she believes will be strong enough to fight back against the galactic threat looming.
However, while this is going on, a number of MCs have banded together to totally fuck off and form a new civilization, with sandworms and hookers. Sheeana takes her sandworms and her vision of a new, better civilization, and fucks off in a giant invisible spaceship, taking with her the following: Duncan Idaho (because obviously), Scytale (I guess I never named him before but he’s the last Tleilaxian), Teg (he has pretty sick psychic powers), aaaand the Jews. Yes, the end of the Dune series is basically just a bunch of MCs and the entirety of, again cannot stress enough how this is not a bit, Secret Israel, escaping to the stars in secret.
While it’s tragic that we will never know the “true” ending of Dune, I think that there has never been another Science Fiction property with so much originality of thought and plot, much less one with so much devotion to philosophy. Herbert had strong beliefs, as I stated earlier, and its inarguable that those made themselves known in his work. Over the course of the 6 Dune novels, he made a case against government, pretty much of any bent, emphasizing the importance of self-actualization and self-government. This is not a story of a Hero’s Journey, as there are truly no heroes in this story. There are antagonists, but the scope is such that you as the reader get to zoom out and see the context of these groups, rising to and falling from power as the millennia pass. Even the most powerful houses can be erased from history, and in at least one stark example, the most important planet in the galaxy can be itself totally destroyed. Whether you idolize or abhor his politics, there really is something for everyone in this unique series, impenetrable as it can be to get through. I leave you with this final quote from Dune, which to me may be the true message of the entire series:
The mystery of life isn’t a problem to solve, but a reality to experience
-Frank Herbert, Dune
LOWER BRACKET FINALS
Feisty Farmers Farming 🧑🌾🌽(4) vs Stanley’s Friends Squad 🐖🫰🐗(2) — [0–2]
Short intro aside, I will have to address the unfortunate circumstances of this particular match. While Dark’s departure from the team was a hit to the Soldiers of Stanley, the week there was an added wrinkle as Cat with a Gat totally no-call no-showed this week, choosing to play Deadlock rather than join his team for this week’s match. Because of the time spent finding a replacement, there was a forfeit issued for game 1, certainly putting a bit of a damper on the match.
So the first game, game 2 saw a big switch up from Farmers, who picked up probably the best Explorer-level player in all of AD2L: PzR’s Luke! But there was a Chinese Fire Drill performed by the team, who moved Gabe mid, Oogie off, Mad to 5 and Luke to 4. Lanes reflected the uncomfortability of these moves, with both mid and top lane falling behind for Farmers on Radiant. Toastie had one of her best laning performances this season, picking up 2 kills and 2 assists in 10 minutes, actually hitting 6 before Oogie’s Underlord. Voidhunter pulled out his iconic Pango, making a splash early by crushing mid (including a first blood snag!) and rotating successfully multiple times. Bot lane was probably the closest, with Mad’s Undying looking strong at 3–2–1, but overall pretty even farm-wise.
Laning phase officially came to a close at 10 minutes with a huge 3 on 4 fight top lane. Underlord found himself ever so slightly out of position, caught by Luna Eclipse and Jakiro Macropyre, but Mad’s Tombstone took down Toastie immediately afterwards. Madgala continued his hunt here, taking down Luna as well, but Pango came in to end his fun. Neni’s Hoodwink picked up a kill on Willow to finish the fight, to barely eke the fight into Dire’s favour. Neni began his tear here, killing PL and beginning what would be a Monster Kill streak. But Radiant was not done fighting top lane, bringing four back just a minute later and blowing the game wide open. A sick Macro took down the Willow early, breaking up the control in the fight and allowing the swarm of SFS to overtake the remaining 3 Farmers. Clinkz was just a little out of position, taking huge damage from, well, everyone as he got rolled on and KILL SECURED by a lil’ Squirrel. Oogie and Mad survived a little longer, just off of their bulk, but there was just nothing to do, no threat to pose.
From here, the game greatly slowed down with both Luna and PL farming hard. However, Rene really showed his farm efficiency once his Manta arrived, using his illusions to shove lanes and skyrocketed above everyone in farm. With no big teamfights, Dire just pulled ahead by almost 10k in the next 10 minutes with Radiant seemingly terrified to make a move. That fear seemed justified as a Farmer’s smoke resulted in a total team wipe at 30 minutes! Pango broke the smoke, and went down in exchange for the Willow, but at the same time a beautiful combo between Neni and Toastie slaughtered the Clinkz, a huge portion of Farmer’s damage in fights. Panda’s PL took down the Jakiro, but simply stood in macro too long, taking almost 1000 damage from Jak in one fight. With no damage left, Luna was free to clean up the fight, nabbing a triple kill and cleaning up a set of bot rax to boot.
On the ropes but not dead yet, the Feisty Farmers punished the overstay of SFS with a somewhat pyrrhic fight midlane. Gabe’s Clinkz had probably his best fight of the game here as Matty’s Cent went down early, along with Luna and Hoodwink, the latter coughing up over 1500g. Panda’s PL did go down, as did Undying and Underlord, but the death of Luna allowed for Farmers to get Roshan and some breathing room.
But bizarrely, Stanley’s Soldiers decided they were the ones who knock. A double pickoff botlane off a Double Damage Luna allowed for a high ground push and effectively a free lane of barracks. I say “effectively” because of one of the funniest things I’ve seen happened, shown to you hear in the form of a log:
From here, it was just a slow, brutal grind to the end. Despite Radiant’s commitment to denying their own T4s (??), the only fight they’d win for the rest of the game was under them. The Friend Squad picked up Rosh, Smoked, and ran into the Radiant Base. This final fight was extremely chaotic, with Clinkz doling out insane damage, but the Ancient falling nevertheless.
I was really impressed by both teams, who showed incredible resilience and mental strength considering the fractious start of the night and between both team and individual play we saw some real highs here. I’d have loved to see another game, but it is what it is. To all players I say congrats, and to The Stanley Soldiers I say: Good Luck!!!
I said it before, and I’ll say it again: I’m proud of each and every one of you; thanks for making this season so fun! As always, thanks for reading!
Greatness is a transitory experience. It is never consistent. It depends in part upon the myth-making imagination of humankind. The person who experiences greatness must have a feeling for the myth he is in. He must reflect what is projected upon him. And he must have a strong sense of the sardonic. This is what uncouples him from belief in his own pretensions. The sardonic is all that permits him to move within himself. Without this quality, even occasional greatness will destroy a man.
- Frank Herbert, Dune
